Simply Stated Saturday

I was going to blog a little on the frustrations I have been having with blogger lately, but just as ironically enough, just when I was about to post about it...everything is fixed! So this post tells of some other personal frustrations I've been having lately...

(for warning - if you don't want to read my "personal vent session" than ignore what's in between the pink lines!)

::But first::

How am I spending my Saturday night?

My boys and I are just enjoying a lazy Saturday - hitting the sack early, sipping on some herbal tea, listening to the late night birds chirp, and watching good ol' Gilmore Girls :)

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There's been a couple other frustrations that I've been dealing with.
Sometimes having a chronic illness, especially an invisible illness can make you (the sufferer) second guess yourself sometimes. People who suffer from invisible illnesses can be misunderstood a lot of the time because they appear healthy on the outside...
To my readers, I may sound like a normal twenty-two year old girl.
I can hide behind the words and you can't see the struggles that I go through everyday. 

♥ photo credit
Here's the thing.
I have my appointment with my new neurologist this Thursday, and I have been busy gathering all of my records from other doctors and MRI's, CT's, blood work, you name it.
I have waited since JANUARY to see this autonomic neurologist.
Somehow, I put this feeling in my head of "will he understand?" & "do I really need to go?"
I felt for awhile that I was having quite a few good days, that I didn't deserve to see him.
I was thinking to myself that I am healthy (while I knew that I wasn't) -
But, people always tell me "you look so good!" or you must be feeling better, etc...
I am so used to putting up this false-self/allowing people to think that I feel okay, when in reality, I feel like absolute hell on the inside.
As weird as it sounds...I just needed to feel self-validated

I haven't checked my vitals in quite some time
(I got sick of my BP machine & Heart Rate Watch)

Here were my results: Left(resting) Right(standing)

Sometimes my numbers are very high and sometimes low
- (This gave me the validation I needed) -
I hope he can help :) I'm hopefully optimistic

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Here is a quote for the day that I love...

Life is an opportunity, benefit from it. Life is beauty, admire it.
Life is bliss, taste it. Life is a dream, realize it.
Life is a challenge, meet it. Life is a duty, complete it.
Life is a game, play it. Life is a promise, fulfill it.
Life is sorrow, overcome it. Life is a song, sing it.
Life is a struggle, accept it. Life is a tragedy, confront it.
Life is an adventure, dare it. Life is luck, make it.
Life is too precious, do not destroy it. Life is life, fight for it.
-- Mother Teresa

♥photo credit

xoxo

-erinj0